Archive for October, 2008

He’s from Barcelona

in Spain…

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October 31, 2008 at 11:51 pm Leave a comment

More fun facts

Butterflies taste with their feet.

Duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why.

In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world’s nuclear weapons combined.

On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year.

On average people fear spiders more than they do death.

Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

It’s possible to lead a cow upstairs…but not downstairs.

The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

A snail can sleep for three years.

No word in the English language rhymes with “MONTH”.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

All polar bears are left handed.

In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies,including their eyebrows and eyelashes.

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

“Go.” is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall.

The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

October 28, 2008 at 9:01 am Leave a comment

Hospital visit

A wealthy hospital patron was being shown around the urology ward.

During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously.

Oh my GOD!’ screamed the woman. ‘That’s disgraceful! Why is he doing that?’ The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained, ‘I’m very sorry that you were exposed to that, but this man has a serious condition where his testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if he doesn’t do that at least five times a day, he’ll be in extreme pain and his testicles could easily rupture.’

‘Oh, well in that case, I guess it’s okay,’ said the woman.

As they passed by the very next room, they saw a male patient laying in bed while a nurse performed oral sex on him.

Again, the woman screamed,

‘Oh my GOD! How can THAT be justified?’

Again the doctor spoke very calmly,

‘Same illness, private insurance.’

October 27, 2008 at 9:52 am Leave a comment

Triumph the Insult Dog meets David Blaine

October 26, 2008 at 4:30 pm Leave a comment

Fun facts

‘Stewardesses’ is the longest word typed with only the left hand

And ‘lollipop’ is the longest word typed with your right hand.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

‘Dreamt’ is the only English word that ends in the letters ‘mt’.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

The sentence ‘The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog’ uses every letter of the alphabet.

The words ‘racecar,’ ‘kayak’ and ‘level’ are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).

There are only four words in the English language which end in ‘dous’: tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: ‘abstemious’ and ‘facetious.’

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A ‘jiffy’ is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain..

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don’t appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

If the population of China walked past you, 8 abreast, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite!

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

The average person’s left hand does 56% of the typing.

The cruise liner, QE 2 moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies’ room during a dance.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

October 24, 2008 at 9:57 am Leave a comment

Who be wantin mo’ stimulus packages?

October 22, 2008 at 5:55 pm Leave a comment

Cornpone

The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

A rubber-band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.

A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, “You stay here. I’ll go on a head”.

I wondered why my baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab cetntre said, “Keep off the grass”.

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, “No change yet”.

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

It’s not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.

The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

When the cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

October 22, 2008 at 3:08 pm Leave a comment

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